‘Is that you, darling?’ I always try to be civil, to fend off the inevitable.
‘Who the hell else would it be?’ The harsh words and jangle of his keys thrown into the dish on the hall stand signal a bad day at work. ‘Or do you have a secret lover?’ His words drip with sarcasm at the very thought of someone like me ever having the audacity to cheat on him.
At first our marriage was plain sailing on a sea of love. We were happy and I was looking forward to a bright future, imagining grandchildren sitting on both our knees as we entered old age. Sex was as hot as Gas Mark 9, the temperature I’d just set on the oven. But over time he’d manipulated me like a puppet, strumming fear through everyone of my strings.
‘How long until dinner?’ he snarls.
‘Won’t be too long. Can I get you a drink?
‘Whisky on the rocks,’ his words hiss at me with enough heat to sizzle the drop of oil I’d poured into the tin tray.
Why had be married me, I often wondered? I’d been plain Jane to what turned out to be his two faced God Janus, although my hair had been a cascade of auburn curls. These days it was as as salt and peppery as the condiments sprinkled over the roast beef. Was it because he’d always enjoyed my culinary skills? Had I baked my way into his heart? They do say the way to a man’s heart…
Over the years I’ve tried my best to blend the ingredients that might improve our marriage: love, kindness, communication. But these days Julian rarely speaks, or gives me the time of day, or adds a cup of the milk…of human kindness. Our sex life barely simmers.
‘Where’s my dinner?’ The oven has barely heated up to the right temperature before his impatience and anger grows and he’s walking towards me.
Julian grabs my hair, pulls me towards him. I flinch at what’s coming, knowing I’ll be as battered as the beaten egg whites in the Baked Alaska nestling white and fluffy in the fridge.
He’d been wrong. I do have a secret lover…a kind man, someone who loves me, someone with whom I can look forward to a bright future.
Tonight I’ve added an extra special ingredient to the Baked Alaska, his favourite, a just dessert for Julian.