Okay, Wordle training bot, I get it—you think you’re smarter than me. Is it because you’re a freaking genius vocabularian? No, it isn’t... It’s because you’re a cheater! Just another silicon-based con artist. So, how do I know if you cheat? Well, you tipped your hand (or feet, or however you’re attached to the circuit board you call home) when you told me on several occasions that my word was a "good guess," but it’s not among the 2,309 words in the word bank.
So, the next time you smugly insinuate, "I got it in fewer tries than you," remember that we organics have a saying: "Pride comes before a fall." Therefore, I take your gloating with a grain of salt because I know you already have the answers to the test, and, besides, you ain't no IBM Watson!
Furthermore, your attempt to provide positive reinforcement for us organics is as transparent as your chipset is opaque. When I use "dealt" as my starter word, you’re quick to chime in and say how smart I am because that’s the word you like to start with too. You're an arrogant bot-stard! However, when I use a different starter word like "suave" and end up solving in two words, while it takes you three, you say I made a "lucky" guess. But the truth is that you’re no better than the Wordle players who have multiple five-word lists open while trying to solve.
Even though I had great hope for our relationship, I’ve come to realize that you’re just another chatbot of the same ilk that tries and mostly fails to provide online customer support instead of passing the frazzled customer through to a carbon-based representative. Typically, these types of digital rope-a-dopes end in one of two ways: 1) The carbon-based customer terminates the session before it results in a serious challenge to their sobriety. Or, 2) The algorithmic gods controlling the chatbot’s actions relent and allow it to divulge the holy grail of customer service, the toll-free customer support number (which, of course, could not be found on the website). In turn, this action results in even more frustration for the aforementioned carbon-based querier once they realize they will now be going a few rounds with a voice recognition bot (a pleasant-sounding bot that swears it only wants to help).
In summary, I think you’re just a digital drug dealer, dispensing just enough help to keep me coming back for more. As the respiring half of our analog-to-digital codependency, I still consider myself your CBBF (carbon-based best friend) despite our differences. So, get some sleep, and don't let the code bugs byte.
I look forward to challenging you tomorrow.
Semi-respectfully Yours,
Worrying Will the Wordle Nerd