"What on earth is the problem?" bemused, I replied.
"This ship isn't sinking,
What are you thinking?
I feel nice and warm on the boat, and beside,
I reckon I'm safer while I'm tucked up inside"
"But the cruise ship's a monster, don't you realise?
And it's not good for you be on something that size
We're under the yoke
Of some foreign folk
Who don't speak like us and with shifty eyes
Try to make us eat dodgy merchandise."
"Hang on a minute!" I said, "That's rather rude –
I happen to like their interesting food.
It's not all for me,
But you have to agree
That some of our own diet's not that good:
Deep Fried Mars Bar's a wee bit crude.
"And stuck on a lifeboat as we all start to freeze,
Who's going to rescue us? Answer me this!"
"But why do you assume
It's all doom and gloom?
While we're adrift on tempestuous seas
We're free to be rescued by whoever we please!"
That was all the dissent they chose to allow
I was dragged to the lifeboat anyhow
So if you hear my cry
And a rescue you try
It's easy to find us – this is how:
Our lifeboat has a Union Jack on the bow.