Neighbors can either be the worst part of life or the best, never both, because you never know who they really are or how you will get along with them. My new one, well, I wasn’t sure where he fit at first.
When I introduced myself to him, after a brief exchange of pleasantries, he ended our conversation by telling me that he was, “a man of irony.” Having absolutely no idea what he meant by that, I left him with a firm handshake and assurances that, if he needed anything, I’d be right next door. I’d also be confused, but still willing to lend a hand.
His first order of business was erecting an eight foot privacy fence around the perimeter of his property. It, naturally, dwarfed the four foot picket fences that were the norm here.
A locksmith came by to install the bulkiest door handle and deadbolt I’d ever seen. I’m assuming that he didn’t leave a spare key under the doormat.
Next came the motion lights and security cameras on each visible corner of the front of the house. A fancy doorbell with another camera completed the front door setup.
I am also almost positive that I saw him ushering two large dogs into his backyard about a week ago. Massive dogs, I should say. Dobermans or Rottweilers, from the looks of them. My suspicions were affirmed when the “Beware of Dog” sign was tacked to the fence.
Another sign, a shiny “No Trespassing” one, landed in the front flower bed. I thought it was surely the final piece of the puzzle because it really finished off and sold the transformation.
It was apparent that my new neighbor wanted no part of any visitors on his property, and he was willing to go to great lengths to make sure everyone kept their distance. I certainly had no intentions of going over. Probably ever. Not after witnessing all of the security measures he’d put in place.
Anytime anything even breathes in the vicinity of his lawn, he will probably know about it and see it before his would-be visitor even has time to think about stepping foot on his property.
And I was wrong about the “No Trespassing” sign being the finishing touch. That came in the form of a garden flag planted directly next to the “No Trespassing” sign. On the flag was the word “WELCOME” in big, brilliant, bold letters.
Once I saw it, I laughed because I realized that my neighbor was exactly who he said he was. I think we will get along just fine.
When I introduced myself to him, after a brief exchange of pleasantries, he ended our conversation by telling me that he was, “a man of irony.” Having absolutely no idea what he meant by that, I left him with a firm handshake and assurances that, if he needed anything, I’d be right next door. I’d also be confused, but still willing to lend a hand.
His first order of business was erecting an eight foot privacy fence around the perimeter of his property. It, naturally, dwarfed the four foot picket fences that were the norm here.
A locksmith came by to install the bulkiest door handle and deadbolt I’d ever seen. I’m assuming that he didn’t leave a spare key under the doormat.
Next came the motion lights and security cameras on each visible corner of the front of the house. A fancy doorbell with another camera completed the front door setup.
I am also almost positive that I saw him ushering two large dogs into his backyard about a week ago. Massive dogs, I should say. Dobermans or Rottweilers, from the looks of them. My suspicions were affirmed when the “Beware of Dog” sign was tacked to the fence.
Another sign, a shiny “No Trespassing” one, landed in the front flower bed. I thought it was surely the final piece of the puzzle because it really finished off and sold the transformation.
It was apparent that my new neighbor wanted no part of any visitors on his property, and he was willing to go to great lengths to make sure everyone kept their distance. I certainly had no intentions of going over. Probably ever. Not after witnessing all of the security measures he’d put in place.
Anytime anything even breathes in the vicinity of his lawn, he will probably know about it and see it before his would-be visitor even has time to think about stepping foot on his property.
And I was wrong about the “No Trespassing” sign being the finishing touch. That came in the form of a garden flag planted directly next to the “No Trespassing” sign. On the flag was the word “WELCOME” in big, brilliant, bold letters.
Once I saw it, I laughed because I realized that my neighbor was exactly who he said he was. I think we will get along just fine.
