In her newfound life, Jennie occasionally missed sex with Jon and hot baths with salts; However, she trusted her canine soulmate wholeheartedly. They split hares down the middle.
Even swarthy men feared the apartment savvy, stoop-sniffing coyote. Someone had spoiled this canid with Pork ‘n Beans, MoonPies, and heaps of easy cat food. Jennie from Riverview Terrace had long grown weary of marriage. Whence had her problems with Jon emerged? She wandered out one night to question the moths. Weeping on her favorite rock, she felt cold skin press her wet cheek. It was the Problem Coyote nosing her!
In her newfound life, Jennie occasionally missed sex with Jon and hot baths with salts; However, she trusted her canine soulmate wholeheartedly. They split hares down the middle. The school playground’s canvas of morning snow was ruffled by boot prints.
Snowballs whizzed through the air as students tried to dodge them. The headteacher, Mr Hall stood watching in his long black coat as white flakes floated softly to the ground. Mr Hall turned to go and a ball of ice crashed into his back then crumbled to the floor. Students stood like statues in horror. He crouched to the floor and shaped a ball from the snow in his gloved hands. As he stood with his arm ready to fire he cheerfully roared, “Right, who threw that!?” “So, you are unhappy with your evaluation.”
Grandpa’s eyes narrowed, measuring the boy. “I suppose you are ready for this story,” he mused. “Unhappy with my German grade, my parents walked over to Ms. Drueck’s house. There she sat on the front porch, drinking a martini. They were not invited to sit down. ‘This must be about the grade,’ she remarked. Just as my father cleared his throat, Ms. Drueck’s hand shot up and stopped him short.” Grandpa paused to take another sip. “What do you think about that?” His grandson shifted uncomfortably and cleared his throat, yet nothing more came out. A silver SUV wearing a red bow sat in our driveway. Mom and I were lighting the tree when it materialized. We could hardly contain our excitement. Mom excused herself and dashed out front, bliss punctuating every step. From inside, I glimpsed bewilderment on the dealership man's face when Mom grabbed the keys. Upon return, she raced upstairs to Dad, shouting her surprise the entire way. Turns out, Dad got confused and had my brother's gift delivered to our home. I didn't know I had a brother. Neither did Mom. We pulled up to the ER in style that Christmas.
Kate took pride in decorating the Christmas tree every year by herself. She would delicately dangle the sparkling ornaments from each branch while drinking a glass of warm mulled wine.
On one December evening Kate allowed her two children to decorate the tree; she thought it would be a good idea as they had seen her do it many times. Kate sat on the edge of the sofa keeping an attentive eye on her kids fumbling her precious decorations. The following morning the kids hopped downstairs and skipped past without noticing that it wasn’t the same tree they had decorated. Stupid people. They think I don't know what's going on. Wrapping presents... filling stockings.. what about me?
I yawn, tuck in my paws, and fall asleep. The next morning I watch them talk and laugh as they open their gifts. How happy they are and how alone I feel. Suddenly, little Krista takes a stocking off the mantle and sits down next to me. "Merry Christmas, Little Kitty", she says as she begins to pull out tiny bags of catnip and shiny toys. I have not been forgotten. Krista pets me and says: "I love you". I answer: "Purr." Winter was mankind's excuse to celebrate. The other seasons built up to its arrival.
Everyone toiled to have plenty for those months. The least they could do was feast. It was a familiar melody around the world. People honored that season's promises. Warmth was always within reach. People sought it out by the fire or with each other. Winter was a time of plenty. It offered moments to reflect on blessings and burdens. For those remaining, they cherished their good fortune. Life was at its finest state. Cheer flowed like wine around the world. Humanity drank it, warming every soul. “It’s like a row of hippopotamuses, shoulder to shoulder.”
“How so?” “You got input on one end, output on the other. Huge logistics.” “That all?” “You got a serious control problem. Anything that aggravates a hippopotamus--which is anything that’s not a hippopotamus--it crushes.” “Be like a herd of cats.” “Not like a herd of cats. Rattle a treat bag and you got a herd of cats with their tails up, snaking down the street behind you. Cats are easy. Hippopotamuses are not easy.” “It’s ‘hippopotami,’ by the way. What’s your point?” “You left the toilet seat up again.” I thought my missed periods were the start of menopause; after all, I'm knocking on the door of fifty. Moreover, I'd been having night sweats and vivid dreams, all symptoms according to the internet. So when Dr. Gabriel said I was expecting a baby, I told him that just wasn't possible. I'm married, but my Joey lost that urge a few years ago, and I can't say I miss it.
Anyway, Dr. Gabriel insisted on giving me a scan; I'm having a boy. I just don't know what I'm going to tell Joey! Tear off your dark skin, girl, and put on a new one. Is that what they want? Don’t answer that.
I stripe a caramel line onto my cheek, followed by a weak brown, then a burnt orange, and stare at myself in the smudgy pharmacy mirror; I match it on the other side, just for fun. The staff look away quickly when they see this strange tiger. Yeah, I know, crazy, isn’t it? I walk out of the store, still wearing the darkest samples, and take all my money with me. I have a fortune. They’re getting none of it. Olivia ran faster than she thought possible. She tripped and stumbled, her favourite red coat snagging on branches. Her breath billowed out before her on this moonlit midwinter night. In the clearing ahead she saw lights, beautiful twinkling lights of all her favourite colours.
"Santa!", she shouted, still running, still hoping, still dreaming. "Wake up, Santa's been", said Olivia's mother, gently shaking her. Olivia threw back the covers and ran for the living room. Her father was already there and pointed at a parcel. Olivia tore into it. Inside was the red coat, the one she always dreamed of. An old friend accosted me on December 24th. I’d avoided him since he got religion, but on this day, I couldn’t refuse his suggestion we go for coffee.
“We must strive,” he said before leaving the café, “to make as much money as possible, but live frugally and use the excess to solve the world’s problems.” A cynical way, I thought as I entered a church for their Christmas Eve carol service, to justify his Porsche SUV and seven-figure income. Minutes later, as I listened to the choir, I almost thought it could work. She hadn’t slept since her father died. She’d sat by his hospital bed and begged him to stay, but after 86 years and all the pain, he’d had enough.
Now when she closed her eyes, she could see him on stage, bow flying across the strings on his violin. The orchestra was frantic behind him, the audience on its feet. No lessons had made her play like that. On Christmas, alone, she came downstairs. He’d set up a small tree for her before he collapsed, leaving a gift beneath it. Slowly, she unwrapped the box. Inside was his shining violin. “Where are you from?” Kris Kringle asks the horde of ragged refugees huddled beneath a scorching desert sun, eyes lifeless.
“Around the world,” a Tower of Babel replies. “Climb aboard the sleigh mobile…there’s room for everyone. Reindeer stamp their hooves ready for flight. The convoy soars beyond Earth into deep black space…until the lead reindeer’s red nose lights on a blue-green planet. “Planet Abundance;” Kris informs, “ample shelter for all colours, creeds and cultures with plentiful food and sparking clean water.” “You are refugees no longer. Spread peace and goodwill throughout your new-found home and nourish your pristine planet. “ The old man sat on the cliff-top bench, staring out to sea. I asked if I could join him and he nodded.
‘Nice day,’ I said. ‘A good and bad day,’ he replied. ‘How so?’ ‘On this day, in 1941, my father was shot down and crashed into the sea right here. I try to come here every year to remember him.’ The old man stiffened and stared intently at the sky, then his gaze travelled down to the surface of the sea. He flinched and inclined his head as if listening. ‘I love you too, Daddy,’ he whispered. Jeff sat by the fire trying to understand the Christmas story.
“why would God transform himself into a human being and come here?“ His thoughts were interrupted by wild geese flying into his window trying to get inside to get warm. It was freezing outside and they would soon die. He opened the barn doors and tried to herd the flock inside, to no avail. He then went into the barn, retrieved his goose, circled the flock and released it. It flew back into the barn followed by the other geese. Suddenly, the Christmas story made perfect sense to Jeff. Some feel sorry for the people who are alone at Christmas. Particularly.
Soar with me, if you will. Above the years that he tried to teach his children to be anti-Semitic. Look for the small children she left for days, to buy drugs. What did they do next? Glimpse down into the lives of dogs left to shiver on a porch. Feel her agony when the bank account was emptied and her womb eight months full. Or her joy when she’s without drama or abuse. There’s a reason people are alone at Christmas. Mind our own business. Let it be. Pontius Gordonous noticed that all new submitters to the ongoing FFF-competition followed the submission protocols, even taking care of that comma in the title, while fifty regular disrupters forgetting that comma. His background from his high school teaching days began to bring back memories of disciplining the inattentive students, while drowning him in debilitating “Godonous PTSD”.
He checked himself into a clinic to try a new treatment of slowly infusing an extract from magic mushrooms. As he began to take the psychedelic trip, his next door kind lady, dressed as a black witch appeared, chanting “May comma bless you forever.” I Inhaled deeply, counted to 5, exhaled as if I were blowing out the biggest, fattest candle I had ever seen. I repeated this 10 times, gulping air, holding my breath, huffing and puffing, before diving into downward facing dog, upward facing dog, then child’s pose.
Waited for calmness to take over my body, crumple me with its sense of hope and control. I lay curled up, still as a mouse about to be snatched by a towering cat. She’s lived in the house on the corner for many years. No one seems to know her name. The house is old and dramatic looking. At night it resembles a crumpled witch’s hat. Some say she has a hundred cats staying there. Various shapes and sizes. We think all the cats in the area have passed through; go there to hang out. She wears long coats, even in warmer weather. Maybe she keeps kittens in the pockets.
This Christmas me and my wife made her a necklace of black velvet. We put a little bell on it. A long time ago, a Baby was born into wicked and deplorable conditions. His parents cried. They didn’t quite understand. The Infant was chilly and damp. His pleas were heard in faraway places.
Two millennia pass. There remains worldwide discord. The people war and clash over unimportant things. No peace to be found among Santas, crèches, carols and hymns. Weeping clouds drench the earth. Yet, the Savior dries their tears. Remember that I came for you all. Rejoice! Spread the Word. I am here! …and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Merry Christmas. Lamby skipped along still wishing someone could answer his questions. Anytime he probed his parents...
“Mom?” “What is it again?” “Look over there. Why is...” “I told you to stop worrying about today. Go and play with the other lambs.” “Enjoy the night Lamby!” Added Father-Sheep. All the lambs exhausted their energies. Then past mid-night, everyone retired to their folks. “Mommy?” “Lamby, an exciting day awaits us. What are the cows yonder missing?” “The Manger!” “Anything peculiar?” Daddy asked. “Mmmm...” “They’re happier, ain’t they?” “YES! Then, that star daddy...” “Baby, it’s Christmas post-corona! REJOICE and share the happiness!" ‘Madam, I’ve served that tea blend for ten years. You’re the only one to complain, hours after visiting my cafe.
‘The folk of Alpha Centauri can hear you too. How could my tea keep you awake that long after consumption? Did you add anything? ‘I don’t mean milk and sugar. Some customers say their special formula and my tea helps them sleep. You know. That’s why you’re moaning. Didn’t happen for you. We might be getting somewhere. ‘No idea on brand. I know they call it gin. ‘So you didn’t add that. I’m sorry, Madam, but I only sell tea.’ ‘Tell me about trees.’ Alice asked.
‘They’re the lungs of the world.’ Weston said. ‘And they have a living spirit.’ ‘Really?’ ‘The stories say that if you cut down a tree it’ll jump up, spin around and fall on top of you.’ ‘Wow!’ Alice said frowning. ‘That’s why we never have a real Christmas tree, because we’d be killing it?’ ‘Exactly.’ Weston said. ‘They’re living things and need protecting. We can get one that looks real.’ Alice looked around the Christmas store, full of artificial trees in an assortment of bright colours. ‘No.’ Alice said. ‘I want the pink one.’ Midnight Mass, carols, hearty greetings, the wrapping and unwrapping of gifts, get-togethers, fairy lights, star-spangled trees, roast turkey, the works... and yet, something’s sorely missing, Ray mused.
“What can I give you?” he said. “I know the longing of your spirit, the lonely road you want us to walk that’s high above the common way and that, despite pretences, few actually take because they’re conscious of its perils but not its sublime rewards. “Help me awaken the light in me, dear Jesus, and inspire me to follow the path it shows, even if it sometimes leads through jungles and deserts.” |
"Classic"
|