LinkedIn Blues, by Gordon Lawrie, Amy Friedman and Jane Reid

A recurring theme on the LinkedIn thread is its flakeyness. All too often it's hard to navigate around the threads, including the Friday Flash Fiction thread, to the great frustration of its contributors. Links such as 'Jump to most recent comments', or simple 'Likes' simply do what they claim. One day Gordon Lawrie vented his frustration in the following 12-bar blues, which incidentally has 100 words in the lyrics.

THE TWELVE-BAR LINKEDIN BLUES

I'd like to tell a story, but I can't spread the news
Yes I'd like to tell a story, but I can't spread the news
There's a "System Upgrade" – I got the LinkedIn Blues

Well I really wanna Like you, but it won't let me choose
Well I really wanna Like you, but it won't let me choose
I can't get to the link – I got the LinkedIn Blues

Well I'm tired of waitin', think I'm gonna turn to booze
Yes I'm tired of waitin', think I'm gonna turn to booze
'Cos I'm losing my mind to the LinkedIn Blues.

Amy Friedman then added a second...

I’m a mandolin playin mama,
Blues ain’t where I tend to go
I’m a mandolin playin mama,
Blues ain’t where I tend to go
But today I’m sad and hollow,
Ain’t no happy here no more

Mandolin sound so happy,
And I’m lonely, feeling blue.
Blues sound so crappy
On a mandolin, that’s true
All that plink plank plunk’s so cheery,
Ain’t the sound to pursue.

Maybe I should play guitar
Or piano, sweet and low
Maybe I could blow a sax
Nice and mournful, maybe so
But mandolin’s what I gots
And the blues won’t let me go …

and then there were three, this time from Jane Reid

Turned my 'puter on this mornin'
Feelin' mighty low.
To the Most Recent Comments
It still won't let me go.
Oh, my darlin' site don't love me
No mo', no mo', no mo.'