I knew it had to be you. You were never clever enough to wipe the sugar-beard from around your mouth.
Did you enjoy the sweet dough sliding down your neck? I bet the taste still lingers on your tongue.
What about the icing? Can you guess the extra ingredient that I added? I’ll give you a clue: it’s something that makes the doughnut more… diet friendly.
Oh, what’s wrong? Can you feel your stomach griping, twisting, and churning? Is your bowel preparing for the brown lava eruption?
That’ll be the secret ingredient.
You can tell me later if it works.