They flocked in their thousands to Southampton for the launch of the new ship, the Environmental Agency’s pride and joy – a £2 million research vessel which would be used to investigate climate change and its impact on the planet.
The ship had been named following an online poll, with more than 25,000 people opting for the most popular suggestion.
Drawing back the champagne bottle ready to smash onto the boat’s side, Her Majesty summoned every last reserve of her queenly dignity.
“I name this ship RRS Boaty McBoatface.”
[Based on a true story.]