"Oohhhh! Ohhhh God! Aahhh!"
Shock. Then the frantic questions: Is this real? Why? Who? What will I do now?
I knew. Shock fading and anger rising, I stormed to our room, and saw her... alone on the bed, rubbing her back.
"Oh," I said awkwardly. "I thought I heard you in here...making noises."
Grimacing, she said, "Oh...yeah. Sorry. I hurt my back earlier and it still hurts. I may need to go to the doctor."
Not thinking, I exclaimed, "Thank God! I'm so relieved!"
Eyes narrowing, she said, "Excuse me?"